'Faking enjoyment costs a dollar an hour extra': Retail manager writes up employee for 'not smiling enough,' workers brainstorm malicious compliance strategies

Author image for JR Atkinson
JR Atkinson • Writer and Editor
Mar 10, 2025 3:00 PM EDT

Unfortunately, part of the service industry, if you're customer-facing, is looking like you're having a good time. It requires a mask of false happiness, and it can take an emotional toll on you. You come home at the end of the day feeling like a birthday clown taking off his face paint to reveal a tired, beaten-down old man. The retail smile is a big part of this. This seems to be especially true if you are a woman. Women are expected to be cheerful as a default, and any deviation from that feels like anger or attitude. Men are often not held to the same standard, since we expect them to be serious and taciturn. 

This is obviously a double standard and should be handled tactfully by managers. The best managers understand that you are overworked and underpaid, and being asked to shellac a smile over your face can feel like a demeaning order. 

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    Cheezburger Image 10476906752
    via Unsplash+ (Getty Images)

    The image does not depict the actual subjects of the story. Subjects are models.

  • That didn't stop the manager in this story, who wrote up an employee for their lack of enthusiasm. When it ruffled the employee's feathers, a community of workers online swooped in to console them, and imagine ways to be a little snarky about the new rule. Read on for the details.

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    Got Written Up for "Not Smiling Enough"

    So, I work at a retail store where management apparently thinks we should all be Disneyland-level cheerful 24/7. Yesterday, I got pulled into the office because a supervisor said I had a "negative attitude" and wasn't smiling enough. Mind you, I wasn't r de, I wasn't slacking, I was just... doing my job.
    via u/bronzeaardvark
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    When I asked what specific incident they were referring to, my manager said a customer mentioned I seemed "unenthusiastic." So now I have a formal write-up because I wasn't grinning like a maniac while folding clothes?
    via u/bronzeaardvark
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    I'm exhausted, underpaid, and now I have to fake happiness just to keep my job? I swear, the corporate world gets more dystopian every day. Has anyone else dealt with this nonsense? What did you do?
    via u/bronzeaardvark
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    Other workers swooped in and took the employee's side.

    Unevenscore42 . 10h ago I always tell my boss that faking enjoyment costs a dollar an hour extra.
    via u/Unevenscore42
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    ChooseWisely83 • 10h ago I had a supervisor tell me I gave too much personal attention to the members. It was a private club, I was the bar manager, and they didn't like that i remembered everyone's drink order because they would expect the same service when I wasn't on shift.
    via u/ChooseWisely83
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    MechShield 9h ago . Lmao they scolded you for being too good at your job.
    via u/MechShield
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    TownEfficient8671 · 10h ago . Are you a woman? Ask how many of your male coworkers have also been reprimanded because it's a known statistic that most people expect women to smile vs men. Ask if gender bias is allowed in the employee handbook.
    via u/TownEfficient8671
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    TidalLion 9h ago . This. The only time I was written up for "not smiling enough" (No, I no longer work there) it was after new management took over. Months after i left, they started going after guys too for "not smiling enough". Pardon us for not smiling for a thankless, soul sucking job with unrealistic targets and times. Those managers were gone within a year, much to everyone's relief from what i was told.
    via u/TidalLion
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    ayoitsjo 6h ago My old job the women were constantly targeted. I got pulled into a meeting with the GM for "looking too tired" another girl for "not walking with purpose" etc. Men were golden boys who could do no wrong even if they sucked.
    via u/ayoitsjo
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    Problem is, gender bias is hard to prove. They could just as well claim their conversations were all valid and just were never needed with the men - it'd be a lie, but who could prove it? Management was also entirely women, and part of their preference towards the men was attraction. They only hired guys they found hot, and then those dudes could get away with murder. Then they got to tout how progressive and totally not sexist they were because it was a "women-run" restaurant and how could wome
    via u/ayoitsjo
  • 12
    Cheezburger Image 10476907520
    via Unsplash+ (Andy Quezada)

    The image does not depict the actual subjects of the story. Subjects are models.

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    • PastorBlinky 10h ago On the bright side, it won't affect your future jobs at all. But this probably wasn't your doing. It's usually a setup. It's just an easy way they can preemptively block any raise you might ask for. "Well, let's check your file... oh, shucks, sorry." It's also used to help fire people in the future. Now if anything happens, they can claim you had a history of poor performance.
    via u/PastorBlinky
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    AdMurky3039 · 10h ago I was let go from a temp job once because I wasn't enthusiastic enough. It was data entry.
    via u/AdMurky3039
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    i2GAu293mZpIDL75 10h ago a write up doesn't mean sh and retail jobs are a dime a dozen. just ignore it
    via u/i2GAu293mZpIDL75
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    Kahlan138 10h ago Was this Target? I was passed over for a promotion there 20+ years ago, and the only feedback on why was "you don't smile enough"
    via u/Kahlan138
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    Hot_Let1571 . 9h ago Yep, I've gotten that; my neutral face looks kind of sad. Like sorry that's just how my face is. :/
    via u/Hot_Let1571
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    Forsaken-Type7003 . 5h ago 57 comments, and not one of them has picked up on the real issue here: that the customer felt it necessary to inform a manager that OP wasn't 'smiling enough'. I mean, c'mon. On a scale of sins committed by retail workers this is absolutely at the bottom of list.
    via u/Forsaken-Type7003
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    What kind of person feels it's their duty to inform a manager of this heinous crime? Answer: someone who relishes having power over people who they perceive as being beneath them, secretly hoping they'll get into trouble, for reasons that I can't fathom. It must be their way of dealing with their own inadequacies.
    via u/Forsaken-Type7003
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    theEssiminator · 8h ago I am living in the EU, (NL) and am always weirded out by what I perceive as fake over cheerfullness. In a professional setting I expect people are friendly, and come across as sincerely willing to help me.
    via u/theEssiminator
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    You can crack a joke if you like, but I do not expect a clerk at the register asking me my life story or something. It is counter productive and just wastes both our time.
    via u/theEssiminator
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    necroticpancreas • 9h ago . I've been told this on multiple occasions, in multiple jobs. Because apparently I have to be grinning like the Joker as I lose my energy to make a tenth of what my boss makes in order to not have to sleep under a bridge. F them.
    via u/necroticpancreas
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    • larkscope 9h ago I was once told by a boss that I wasn't enthusiastic enough. I started out that way. Then her constantly grinding me down and minimizing me and putting her insecurities on me k lled that. And at that point I was told to be more like the favored employee who could do no wrong (no shade to them, they didn't actually participate in the bs against me).
    via u/larkscope
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    No_Snow_8746 · 8h ago Ah so that's where the over the top fake smiley smiley customer service thing comes from. You guys have it forced upon you. Tell your boss that normal people don't like it.
    via u/No_Snow_8746
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    AdministrativeWay... . 6h ago Seems like a good time for malicious compliance. Had a female coworker who had the same thing happen. She smiled all right but made it look pretty evil and started speaking in a completely monotone voice. Didn't take long for the management to tell her she doesn't have to smile all the time anymore.
    via u/AdministrativeWay241
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    YourBlackSailorSco... . 6h ago Back as a teenager I worked at McDonald's. One of my coworkers was written up for the same thing, so he did the reasonable thing and started smiling like a psycho. I loved working with him! He'd ask customers if they wanted extra happy with their happy meals with a crazed look
    via u/YourBlackSailorScout

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boss antiwork workplace-stories smiling toxic-workplace job double standard retail bosses work coworkers working reddit story toxic-boss workplace reddit thread bad bosses Reddit smile toxic-work-environment
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